These Are The 10 Trashiest Cities In Minnesota

Do you know anyone whom you’d refer to as Trashy? Most likely. Either there’s someone at your job, in your neighborhood, or in your family that you’d throw that label on.

Essentially, Trashy is everywhere.

While calling someone Trashy might be a mean-spirited way of ridiculing or poking fun at a particular demographic, it can also serve as a way to express disdain about the way someone lives their life. It isn’t as derogatory as using other racial slurs, and in fact, the term has a bit of humor associated with it, making it the focus of pop culture.

Take for instance Jerry Springer, Honey Boo Boo, Kid Rock, Eminem, Uncle Rico from Napoleon Dynamite and even Cousin Eddie in National Lampoon movies.

According to the Merriam Webster Dictionary, trashy is defined as:

“A term used broadly to define a person or group of persons whom embody the concepts of ignorance, racism, violence, alcoholism, poverty, and anglo-saxon ancestry. Similarly used with the term ‘cracker,’ ‘hillbilly’ or ‘redneck’.”

So, using some data crunching, we should be able to measure where the most Trashy communities in the state of Minnesota are actually located.

After pouring over data, watching too many fist fights and perusing illiterate Facebook comments, we’ve determined these are the most Trashy cities in Minnesota:

1. Moorhead (Photos)
2. Little Falls (Photos)
3. St. Cloud (Photos)
4. Brainerd (Photos)
5. Bemidji (Photos)
6. Willmar (Photos)
7. Faribault (Photos)
8. Virginia (Photos)
9. Cambridge (Photos)
10. Hibbing (Photos)

Time to take some meth and stay up all night with us as we go through the cities one by one. And before you say we’re some kind of reverse racist, you can also check out the most Ghetto city in Minnesota.

For more reading, check out:

• These Are The 10 Best Places To Retire In Minnesota For 2018
• 10 Worst Places To Live In Minnesota
• 10 Safest Places In Minnesota

How we determined the most trashy cities in Minnesota?

Using publicly available government data, as well as Google Maps, we were able to collect the data on the following trashy metrics:

• Cities where there are lots of white people
• Cities where residents are poorer than average
• Cities where a high number of residents are high school dropouts
• Cities with higher number of bowling alleys per capita
• High drug use
• Higher than average Payday Loan Outlets
• Violent cities (measured in aggravated assaults)
• Cities with a high number of residents on welfare

We used the government Census for most of the data. For drug use and violence, we used FBI data, and for Cash Advance Outlets, we used Google Maps.

Simple, right?
We limited the analysis to non-CDPs that have over 5,000 people.
Then, we ranked each place from 1 to 120 for each of the trashy criteria.

Next, then averaged all the ranks to create a “trashy index”.

In the end, Moorhead ended up being the the most trashy city in the North Star State.

1. Moorhead

Population: 42,005
Estimated Trashy: 10,453
Estimated Meth Heads: 3,513
Welfare population: 20%
Payday Loan Outlets: 6

Toss back a Budweiser, suck down another Camel, Moorhead, cause you’re the whitest trash of all in Minnesota.

The 586 ranks in the top 10% for several categories, including the number of residents on welfare and the most amount of high school dropouts.

Don’t laugh, Detroit Lakes. You weren’t too far out of the top 10 yourself.

2. Little Falls

Population: 8,437
Estimated Trashy: 2,444
Estimated meth heads: 954
Drug use: 5th in MN

The 320 was home to the infamous trashy Walmart fight between the woman in the jammies and the other woman in the jammies. Maybe they should fight at their local dollar store so they won’t feel like they have to dress up.

3. St. Cloud

Population: 67,949
Estimated Trashy: 15,283
Estimated meth heads: 2,946
High school dropouts: 17%

‘The Cloud’ is located just off the 94, where White Castle and the Mississippi River meet.

According to online forums, the 320 has a major drug problem. Even the river rats are doing heroin, here. Trashy river rats? That should be a reality show for sure!

You know you’re from Stearns County if you’re hangin’ at The Underground with your ‘hick click’ on a Saturday night.

4. Brainerd

Population: 13,415
Estimated Trashy: 2,979
Estimated meth heads: 913
Payday Loan Outlets: 6
Assaults ranking: 19th in MN

Located northwest of Minneapolis on the corner of the Liquor Pigz and Jack’s House Bowl is Brainerd, Minnesota.

This cowtown is definitely one of the “whitest cities” on our list. The number of drug-related crimes and aggravated assaults, combined with the high number of poor dropouts, makes this trashy central for Crow County.

Hey Crow County, stay classy and keep it trashyy. Otherwise we won’t have anything to write about.

5. Bemidji

Population: 14,691
Estimated Trashy: 3,225
Estimated meth heads: 934
Assaults: 7th for small cities in MN

Chances are, if you and your kid(s) moved in with someone after just two dates, than you might be from Bemidji.

This city, on the shores of Lake Bemidji, ranks fifth in the state for aggravated assaults (meaning drunken fist fights). And in pure trashy form, when it comes to fightin’ over that week’s favorite meth slut, you better believe it will be handled bare knuckle to bare knuckle in your trailer’s front yard. Just please, please, watch out for the boat on cinder blocks, and the crapper, and the broken down mower.

6. Willmar

Population: 19,699
Estimated Trashy: 5,265
Estimated meth heads: 964
Welfare population: 25%

Willmar (AKA Meth-mar) is located at the base of Foot Lake, just west of Minneapolis.

This city in the 320 ranks in the top 5 for three separate trashy metrics, including number of aggravated assaults and for poor, white single mothers on welfare.

When it comes to defining proper trashy etiquette in this town, always remember the cardinal rule: You need to be careful what you say in 320 because someone might come over and pop the wheels on your house.

7. Faribault

Population: 23,517
Estimated Trashy: 7,675
Estimated meth heads: 1,312
Deadbeat dads: 7%

According to online forums, Faribault has some major slums and disgruntled meth head Viking fans. Hey don’t shoot the messenger!

These Rice County hustlers rank in the top 5 for three separate trashy metrics, including a number of aggravated assaults, and for poor, white single mothers on welfare.

8. Virginia

Population: 8,737
Estimated Trashy: 1,345
Estimated meth heads: 1,345
Drug use: 15th in MN

Virginia is located just North of Duluth and comes in eighth on our list. This number, however, doesn’t reflect the high number of mullets (is it a mullet, a perm, or merm, V-town?), shag haircuts, bangs teased out like it’s 1990, and the number of people who wear pajamas to the Dollar Store.

Here, if the trashy don’t have ‘Mountain Dew’ Mouth (AKA meth mouth) they’re not doing it right. The townies have more tattoos than teeth. If the SLC-County peeps weren’t spending so much on meth, the dentists in this place would be making a fortune.

And word on the street, they are down with O.P.P. – other people’s pills. They are 15th in the state for drug use and they have the largest number of methadone clinics per capita.

#BestPlaceToGetYourFixInMN

9. Cambridge

Population: 8,437
Estimated Trashy: 1,444
Estimated meth heads: 954
Drug use: 9th in MN

Located on the corner of the 65 and the 95 is Cambridge, Minnesota. Here there a large number of people who live on disability, or work at one of the Dollar Stores in the area. Just because you shop at the local dollar stores does not make you ‘country chic,’ C-town, it makes you trashy.

And a lot of your trash must be getting into fist fights at Junction Bowl when they run out of Busch Light, because you are 3rd for aggravated assaults.

10. Hibbing

Population: 16,904
Estimated Trashy: 3,204
Estimated Meth Heads: 997
Welfare population: 17%

Rounding out the list of the ten most trashy cities in Minnesota brings us to Hibbing. This is where the high class trashy live. You think you’re ‘all that’ with your Dollar Store, Hibbing Bowling, and your Super Walmart to wear your pajamas, swimsuits, and wife beaters to.

Obviously, H-Town, is home to the high class trashy. It‘s a lifestyle, here. It’s not everyday you become the home of the ‘Meth-Sandwich.’ So fancy.

There You Have It

According to the official dictionary definition of Trashy, and based on stereotypes that the internet says are true, using science to determine the most Trashy cities in a state can’t be too far off.

If you’re analyzing cities in Minnesota with lots of angry welfare recipients, single mothers and where people have lots of options for payday cash loans, this is an accurate list.

If you’re curious enough, here are the least trashy places in Minnesota:

1. Shoreview
2. Eden Prairie
3. Arden Hills

For more Minnesota reading , check out:

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• These Are The 10 Laziest Cities In Minnesota