Do you know anyone whom you’d refer to as Trashy? Most likely. Either there’s someone at your job, in your neighborhood, or in your family that you’d throw that label on.
Essentially, Trashy is everywhere.
While calling someone Trashy might be a mean-spirited way of ridiculing or poking fun at a particular demographic, it can also serve as a way to express disdain about the way someone lives their life. It isn’t as derogatory as using other racial slurs, and in fact, the term has a bit of humor associated with it, making it the focus of pop culture.
Take for instance Jerry Springer, Honey Boo Boo, Kid Rock, Eminem, Uncle Rico from Napoleon Dynamite and even Cousin Eddie in National Lampoon movies.
According to the Merriam Webster Dictionary, trashy is defined as:
“A term used broadly to define a person or group of persons whom embody the concepts of ignorance, racism, violence, alcoholism, poverty, and anglo-saxon ancestry. Similarly used with the term ‘cracker,’ ‘hillbilly’ or ‘redneck’.”
So, using some data crunching, we should be able to measure where the most Trashy communities in the state of Florida are actually located.
After pouring over data, watching too many fist fights and perusing illiterate Facebook comments, we’ve determined these are the most Trashy cities in Florida:
- Jacksonville (Photos)
- Brooksville (Photos)
- Tallahassee (Photos)
- Gainesville (Photos)
- Spring Hill
- Daytona Beach (Photos)
- Melbourne (Photos)
- Hollywood (Photos)
- Lakeland (Photos)
- Ocala (Photos)
Time to take some meth and stay up all night with us as we go through the cities one by one. And before you say we’re some kind of reverse racist, you can also check out the most Ghetto city in Florida.
How we determined the most trashy cities in Florida?
Using publicly available government data, as well as Google Maps, we were able to collect the data on the following trashy metrics:
- Cities where there are lots of white people
- Cities where residents are poorer than average
- Cities where a high number of residents are high school dropouts
- High drug use
- Higher than average Payday Loan Outlets and Dollar Stores
- Violent cities (measured in aggravated assaults)
- Cities with a high number of residents on welfare
We used the government Census for most of the data. For drug use and violence, we used FBI data, and for Cash Advance Outlets, we used Google Maps.
Simple, right?
We limited the analysis to non-CDPs that have over 5,000 people.
Then, we ranked each place from 1 to 172 for each of the trashy criteria.
Next, then averaged all the ranks to create a “trashy index”.
In the end, Jacksonville ended up being the the most trashy city in the Sunshine State.
1. Jacksonville
Population: 821,196
Estimated Trashy: 129,367
Estimated Meth Heads: 25,513
Dollar Stores: 20
Toss back a Budweiser, suck down another Marlboro, Jacksonville, cause you’re the whitest trash of all in Florida.
The 904 ranks in the top 10% for several categories, including the number of residents on welfare, the most amount of high school dropouts, as well as the number of aggravated assaults. You might see a ton of Florida Crackers at Chik-Fil-A here.
The meth problem is so bad in J-ville that they’ve created a ‘Meth Watch’. The people on meth watch the people on meth because they have nothing better to do with their day.
Don’t laugh, Leesburg or you, Lake City. You guys weren’t too far out of the top 10 yourself.
2. Brooksville
Population: 8,436
Estimated Trashy: 7,999
Estimated meth heads: 4,965
Brooksville has a ton of pillbillies and hillbillies, according to online forums. And although it’s small, the ratio of trash to not trash is pretty high.
This gem in Hernando County (northeast of Port Richey) ranks in the top 5 for three separate trashy metrics, including a number of aggravated assaults, payday loan outlets, and dollar stores per capita.
Here, they have their own set of trashy problems since drug-related arrests are on the rise in the 352.
#JustLivin’TheDreamInThe352
3. Tallahassee
Population: 190,949
Estimated Trashy: 50,283
Estimated meth heads: 24,546
High school dropouts: 17%
Chances are, if you and your kid(s) moved in with someone after just two dates, than you might be from ‘The Hassee’.
This city, in Leon County, ranks fifth in the state for aggravated assaults (meaning drunken fist fights). And in pure trashy form, when it comes to fightin’, you better believe it will be handled bare knuckle to bare knuckle in your trailer’s front yard.
And if you ever get that mower fixed, make sure you head on down to The Palace, Wells, and Poor Paul’s on your next Trashy bar crawl. They have great specials on Busch Light.
4. Gainesville
Population: 133,415
Estimated Trashy: 26,979
Estimated meth heads: 5,913
Payday Loan Outlets: 2
Assaults ranking: 5th in FL
Located off the 75 in North Central Florida is Gainesville (AKA Pillville). Here, a large number of people either work as aerosol and sudafed mixologists, or at one of the 14 Dollar Stores in the area. Shopping at the local dollar stores does not make you ‘country chic,’ Hogtown, it makes you trashy.
And a lot of your trash must be getting into fist fights at the Alley Gator when they run out of Busch Light, because you’re 3rd for aggravated assaults.
That’s right, in Alachua County, they fight over the lawn mower; they fight over what beer is better (Busch or Natural Light) and they fight over who has more teeth. They just have a real chip on their shoulders.
Simmer down, G-town. #NoShoesNoShirtNoTeethNoProblem
5. Spring Hill
Population: 98,691
Estimated Trashy: 26,225
Estimated meth heads: 6,934
Assaults: 7th for small cities in FL
Nothin’ says trashy like a good ‘ol ass whoopin at a Walmart. You just might see that in Spring Hill on the first of the month.
In fact, the 352 was home to the infamous trashy Walmart fight between the woman in the jammies and the other woman in the jammies. Maybe they should fight at one of their 10 dollar stores so they won’t feel like they have to dress up.
In Hernando County, they ARE down with O.P.P. – other people’s pills. They are 15th in the state for drug use. And when they say they have their G.E.D., it means they “got every drug”.
6. Daytona Beach
Population: 66,737
Estimated Trashy: 15,345
Estimated meth heads: 2,945
Drug use: 15th in Fl
Located on the Northern Atlantic Coast where the lot lizards hang at both Crooks and Daytona Bowl is Daytona Beach.
Is that Ricky Bobby’s kid? Fair question, D-town. They are the holy trinity of trashy glamour with Bike Week, spring break, and NASCAR. But, don’t get your boxers in a bunch, we know the 3 things you don’t mess with in trashy land: racin’, drinkin’, and drinkin’ beer. And if you live in the 386, there’s a good chance you ain’t racin’, you’re drinkin’ beer.
#BestPlaceToGetYourFixInThe386
Hey Volusia County, if it’s 3 AM and you’re reading this while devouring your “methwich” instead of changing your baby’s diaper, you’re probably trashy.
7. Melbourne
Population: 76,517
Estimated Trashy: 18,675
Estimated meth heads: 1,912
Dollar Stores 17
Melbourne is located on the east coast in central Florida: where Zaxby’s and the Indian River meet.
According to online forums, the 321 has a major drug problem. Even the river rats are doing heroin, here. Trashy river rats? That should be a reality show for sure!
You know you’re from Brevard County if you’re hangin’ at Shore Lanes with your hick click and you send your best friend to get cigs and he calls 30 minutes later to tell you he got arrested with 5 oz of the white stuff.
#YouAlmostFeltTheWindInYourMullet.
8. Hollywood
Population: 140,632
% White: 75.19%
% Single Moms: 10.08%
This coastal city comes in eighth on our list. This number, however, doesn’t reflect the high number of mullets (is it a mullet, a perm, or merm, H-town?), shag haircuts, bangs teased out like it’s 1990, and the number of people who wear pajamas to one of the 20 Dollar Stores.
Here, if the trashy don’t have ‘Mountain Dew’ Mouth (AKA meth mouth) they’re not doing it right. If the Broward County eeps weren’t spending so much on meth, the dentists in this place would be making a fortune.
Hey Hollywood, keep it classy and and a whole lot trashyy, otherwise we won’t have anything to write about.
9. Lakeland
Population: 97,913
Estimated Trashy: 34,265
Estimated meth heads: 8,964
Dollar Stores 20
Lakeland ranks in the top 5 for three separate trashy metrics, including number of aggravated assaults, number of dollar stores, and number of bowling alleys.
When it comes to defining proper trashy etiquette in this town, always remember the cardinal rule: You need to be careful what you say in Polk County because someone might come over and pop the wheels on your house. Or was it, you mess with me, you mess with the whole trailer park? So confusing. That’s what happens when you try livin’ the L-town Way: 24 Busch Lights in a case, 24 hours in a day. Genius.
And if you’re a Polk County dead-beat dad named Rick who snorts Tylenol (because he can’t afford adderall), and you moved to Palatka with your sister’s best friend, you might be from Lakeland.
#MauryWorthy
10. Ocala
Population: 59,904
Estimated Trashy: 15,204
Estimated Meth Heads: 2,997
Dollar Stores: 20
Rounding out the list of the ten most trashy cities in Florida brings us to Ocala. This is where the high class trashy live. You think you’re ‘all that’ with your 20 Dollar Stores, 2 bowling alleys, 19 payday loan outlets, and your 6 Walmarts to wear your pajamas, swimsuits, and wife beaters to.
Located in central Florida, this city is home to the high class trashy. It‘s a lifestyle here.
“Oh Give Me a Home! Where the Meth Heads Roam. And the Trash and the Hillbillies Play!”
There You Have It
According to the official dictionary definition of Trashy, and based on stereotypes that the internet says are true, using science to determine the most Trashy cities in a state can’t be too far off.
If you’re analyzing cities in Florida with lots of angry welfare recipients, single mothers and where people have lots of options for payday cash loans, this is an accurate list.
If you’re curious enough, here are the least trashy places in Florida:
- Parkland
- Belle Isle
- Weston
If you know anyone in Alabama, share with them the 10 Most Trashy Cities in Alabama. They’ll love it!
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